Yeah, seriously, more like "A Million Little LIES!!!!"

Here is a prank that, as we say about some of God's commandments, is time bound. This means that it can only be done in the right time and place. And that time and place is this pop cultural moment.

I'll set it up. Sometimes you are in your favorite coffee shop (like Starbucks) and you see an attractive member of the opposite or same sex. You want to talk to them but you don't have anything to say.

Here's a hint: if they are reading a book, talk to them about the book! If you've read the book, great, but even if you haven't, you can still talk to them about it by looking at the cover.

For example, if they are reading a Harry Potter book, you can say, "Oh, I read that book-- my favorite part is where the kid with the glasses rides the broomstick" (or whatever crazy thing Harry's doing on the cover).

Or if it's The Da Vinci Code, you say, "Oh that book is great-- my favorite part is the part with the Mona Lisa." (This has the added bonus of showing that you appreciate the visual, as well as the literary arts. Chicks totally cream themselves for that kind of shit-- trust me).

And if it's the paperback edition of Catcher in the Rye, you could say, "Oh, that was my favorite book in high school! I like that part where it's a really really foggy day and/or it's a blizzard but either way you see a vivid rainbow in the upper left corner of the sky." (I think this book is really famous so it will make you seem very literary if you talk about it).

Anyway, the other day, I was paying a visit to my favorite java* vendor and there was an attractive member of the same or opposite sex there. I noticed that she was reading a book. And that book was "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey. When faced with this situation in our post 1/08 world** there are several pranks that immediately present themselves.

I will outline them. The important thing with all of these pranks is that you must be completely sincere and not show even an ounce of sarcasm:

1)
You (casually): Hey, how is that book? I think my friend was reading it and said it was good. Is it worth picking up? I don't know much about it...

2)
You (heartfelt, passionate): Oh wow-- isn't that book amazing?? What an amazing story, right? I mean, to overcome all of that. I just don't know how he does it, y'know? It's just amazing...

3)
You (conspiratorially): Hey, I hear he made that whole book up-- No, seriously, I saw it on the Oprah Winfrey Show on ABC. It's all bullshit! [If you want to learn more about this television program, follow this internet hyperlink: http://www.oprah.com. -ed.]

4)
You (thinking to yourself, "this would make a great prank for my Pranks WeBlog"): ...

I won't tell you which option I chose, but suffice it to say,
fin



*FYI, java means coffee in Spanish.
**Who could forget where they were when the Tragic Events of January 8 unfolded? [If you don't remember just follow this internet hyper link: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0104061jamesfrey1.html -ed.]